The Fear You Won't Fall
by elismorty
Summary: Since birth, Eli Goldsworthy has always understood the inevitability of the timer installed in his wrist - a device that counts down to the day one meets their soul mate. With only ten days remaining on his counter, Eli finds himself faced with the burdensome question he's carried for years: where do the lines of fate and choice in matters of the heart blur?
1. Start of Time

**Okay! Hi there, I'm back to writing. I'm not sure if anybody reading followed along with the stories I did last year, (which, unfortunately, I really lost momentum for and will not be returning to) but recently a huge burst of motivation hit me. I'm extremely excited about this story and scout's honor, I intend to write it from start to finish.**

**For the sake of being brief in this author's note, I'll only say that this concept was adapted from the movie Timer, though it has no ties to the film whatsoever other than the soul mate timer element. It takes place during season ten, i.e. the Misfit's golden age, so the story will revolve heavily around them.**

**I'm sure I've said more than enough already so please do enjoy the first chapter! I'll be relying heavily on feedback and reviews to see where I want to go with it next, so please don't be shy about telling me what you think!**

* * *

If he could have scratched it out of his skin, he would have dug his nails right under his flesh long ago, scraping it out of his veins and tossing it aside. If there had been a way to avoid its installation in the first place, there was no doubt that he would have opted out of the procedure. Infancy hadn't offered him much in the way of options, a fact that never failed to color his expression with a grimace.

Rolling onto his opposite side in bed, Eli ignored the persistent beeping of his alarm clock, not bothering to stifle back a groan of displeasure at the sound. As a rule of thumb, he rarely ever felt settled but today was a special brand of disconcerted; a kind he had convinced himself for the past four years that he would never experience.

Reluctantly, he dragged himself off to the bathroom for a shower, mechanically going through the motions and eventually finding himself right back in his room, a towel wrapped snugly around his waist. It was only before washing up that Eli removed his thick black buckle wristband, exposing the LCD screen embedded in his skin behind it.

At one point in time, he hadn't looked at it for a full year, already knowing that far more time than that was still on the counter- not to mention the fact that he'd grown so apathetic to the gadget. While everyone else around him was either checking their counters compulsively or happily paired with whoever was on the receiving end of theirs, Eli liked to pretend he hadn't been born with one at all. Ignoring it didn't gnaw at him, never succumbing to a compulsion to look at it like most; essentially developing a complex over the entire concept. He could understand the appeal, the anticipation of watching the seconds dwindle with each passing day. Though fleeting, he'd felt similarly about the timer when he was younger, always having had a perfect example of its accuracy in his parents.

It made him feel better to obscure the screen once again, tightening his bracelet around it securely before digging out clothes from his dresser. Though other people might have put effort into their first days at school, Eli's apathy truly knew no bounds, pouring over into just about every facet of his life. After randomly picking a black t-shirt and a pair of jeans, he threw them on, raking his fingers carelessly through his still dampened locks.

From just outside the door, he could hear heavy footsteps approaching, Bullfrog's telltale stride identifiable by sound alone. Moments later, a knock could be hear at the door, Eli grunting out a "hrrm" through the door to invite his father in.

"I'm shocked you're even awake." his dad commented incredulously, not sparing Eli a mocking laugh at his uncharacteristic punctuality.

Waving his hand dismissively, Eli scanned the clutter of his room for his backpack, completely forgetting where he'd left it a few days prior. "Don't go assuming this is me turning over a new leaf or anything. I wouldn't want to get your hopes up unnecessarily." he griped in return, finally spotting the strap of his tattered bag and tugging it closer to him.

"It wouldn't be the worst thing, you know. This is your fresh start, kiddo."

"There's no such thing as a fresh start. Your baggage follows your everywhere. Running from it is only placating yourself into believing you can even leave it behind." he rebutted, busying himself with shoving his notebooks and class schedule into the bag.

Eli wasn't about to persuade himself that anything he endured while at his old school could easily be stored away in a proverbial box, taped shut with a sticker that read, "do not open". The box was ever-present, not even requiring a dusting off with how frequently he came back to revisit it mentally. If ever there was a king of ruminating thoughts, he felt confident in claiming the title for himself.

Entering a little further inside the room – side stepping a plethora of comic books stacked just left to the door – Bullfrog propped himself up against the side of his bed. "Listen, your mom and I, we just want-"

"The best for me. You want the best for me, I know." Eli interjected, exhaling slowly before looking to his father, giving him his full attention finally. "And I want to be whatever it is you two are hoping I'll be, but I know better than to promise that switching schools will be a miracle cure. But I'm trying. I am." he replied, a sudden rush of ineptitude filling him to the brim. It was rare that Eli ever felt as though he was something even close to a success, falling short of his own expectations as well those of everyone else around him.

The past year had been a cycle of withdrawing and crumbling in on himself, mixed in with a hint of bitter, enraged lashing out. To say it was tumultuous would be a severe understatement, and at this point, Eli sincerely wondered why his parents even bothered to have faith in him anymore. It seemed like the least he could do was make them proud and give them less of a reason to be concerned, and yet that was the most impossible task of all for him.

It was the constant hopes, the expectations, the preconceived notions about who Eli should be and how from those around him that made him the most unsettled, and having a timer installed in his arm that dictated when he would supposedly fall in love only added to that nagging pressure.

Taking a step forward, Bullfrog's full, calloused hand settled on his son's shoulder, gripping it affectionately. "Eli, you're everything I've ever hoped my son would be, and then some." he assured, his voice just as gruff as it ever was by nature, but harboring a sincerely warm tone beneath it. Bullfrog was the most adept at talking Eli down from his ledges, even when he couldn't understand exactly what they were. "You've got nothing to prove to me or Cece. We just want you to be happy. You deserve that after everything you've gone through."

Though comforting, his father's words came with a hint of a sting, Eli inwardly marveling at how he used the word 'happy' in a sentence so fluidly. As if it was the most achievable thing in the world, grasping such an elusive emotion and wearing it on your sleeve, day in and day out. To Eli, there wasn't a more complex and practically fictional concept in the world; except perhaps the idea that one could meet their soul mate at the end of a timer.

Turning his head slightly, he caught sight of the small indentation on Bullfrog's wrist, a rectangle shaped scar where his timer had once been. It reminded Eli of the fact that for him, his happiness had been achieved years before in the form of Cece, taking a very lost and emotionally battered Bullfrog and gradually bringing giving him new purpose. He'd always said she saved his life, and it was clear in every smile of gratitude he sent her way. Their love was the tangible kind. Eli was convinced that even if timers never existed, they inevitably would have found their way to each other regardless.

Such a thing didn't exist for him though, there was no way he could ever come to deserve it after all was said and done.

With a simple nod, he mustered up as genuine of a smile as he could despite his regret-addled mind, trying to be grateful for the limitless support his parents offered.

"Be downstairs in ten though, alright? We gotta get you to the main office and make sure you're all set up for your classes." he called while exiting the room, leaving it ajar before bounding down the stairs again.

Resigned once more to his room and the task at hand, Eli drew in a slow breath, letting it out and grasping the strap of his backpack. Slinging it over his shoulder, he tried not to focus on the inevitable outcomes attending this school would bring. It would mean adjusting to a whole new version of ostracizing at the hand of his peers- something he was prepared for but certainly not enthused about. It would mean becoming familiar with classes and people he wouldn't come to care about, creating a routine that he didn't feel even remotely interested in.

But to him, those matters didn't even make it to the top of the list. What was pressing most heavily on his mind since enrolling at Degrassi was the fact that up until that day, curiosity hadn't hit him concerning his timer. He'd gone so far as to put a strip of tape over it, shielding the numbers on the screen. It never occurred to him to look, making it so he practically forgot it existed. When he finally- out of morbid curiosity- decided to take a peek, the numbers staring back at him that day took him by surprise.

Pulling off the wristband momentarily, Eli turned his arm over, a rising sense of dread engulfing him at the numbers he knew would be ticking themselves down.

**0010d 16h 45m 28s**

* * *

Toying with a stray curl that hung beside her face, Clare was keeping herself busy getting ready for school, her body jolting in panic as she heard a loud bang from just down the hall. Her heart was left racing even as awareness of the source hit her, emitting a soft groan to herself a beat later.

The fighting was becoming a normal presence in the home, as familiar as the doorbell chiming or the phone ringing. The fact that Clare could even apply the term 'normal' to what was quite obviously a chaotic and stressful living situation was remarkable to her, her entire definition of family life being re-written with each fight her parents had. She couldn't be sure what it was about this time but without a doubt, it was something blown entirely out of proportion, escalating into a screaming match that easily could have woken the dead.

Trying to shake the rattled disposition out of her body, she sat up from her desk chair, pushing it in and settling her hands on her hips. The first day back always left Clare feeling an excited sort of anxiety, mixed with a rejuvenated hope for what was to come. Grade nine hadn't been a cake walk, filled with multiple events an eighth grade Clare never would have foreseen for herself, but this year was sure to be different than any that came before it. For one, she'd abandoned the wire-frame glasses that ordinarily adorned her face, undergoing surgery to correct her vision. It was something she'd always hoped to do as a child, and it hadn't become a decision she regretted.

Already she could feel her confidence tripling, a new sense of self emerging with the fresh appearance. She'd been enrolled in all honors classes, including a grade eleven course that most younger students wouldn't dream of getting into. All in all, the year was looking up, but especially for one specific reason.

The one thing that kept Clare afloat in times that she felt utterly alone, secluded in her room with a book while her parents traded enraged insults, was the timer on her arm. Though silent, the constant ticking of each second brought her that much closer to companionship, to belonging. To comfort and what she'd always dreamed of – true love.

Like many girls over the years, Clare was all but fixated with the device, checking it even when she knew the date was far off. She couldn't think of a more romantic concept, her entire life leading up to the point that her timer indicated. It hadn't taken long for her to do the math, realizing that the date would fall during her grade ten year, when she was fifteen years old. It was much to the chagrin of her best friend, Alli, whose timer added up to her eighteenth birthday exactly. Though her friend was boy crazy essentially from birth, Clare always knew that whoever it would end up being for her, was well worth the wait. Daydreaming about how the situation would play out beat chasing after boys any day, Clare allowing Alli to adopt those habits instead. She believed in the timer's validity and accuracy without question, having seen it work for family members before. Even her parents were soul mates, which added an extra sense of ease when the two found themselves butting heads. Surely if they were meant to be together, eventually the bad parts of their marriage would peter out, leaving behind a better, more stable relationship in their wake.

Years had been spent fantasizing about how the meeting with her soul mate would take place, what he would look like and what his reaction would be to her. In her most idealistic imaginings, the boy was always relieved to finally have encountered her, immediately and willingly becoming close to her. More pessimistic versions occasionally reared their heads, but Clare never failed to talk herself out of those worries.

There were stories about people who had their timers stop without warning, a sign that their soul mate had died., The two connected timers failed to work without the other living individual. It was a chilling thought to consider, her heart breaking for those who actually had to experience it. Of all the things Clare was afraid of, even when stacked up against her own death and every other imaginable event of impending doom, her timer stopping out of nowhere was her biggest fear. It wasn't just her unwavering devotion to Nicholas Sparks (though that certainly added to the tendency) that shaped her opinions about love, but the fact that she couldn't even begin to imagine a purpose in life without it. Such a thing surely existed, and everyone deserved to experience it.

A booming shout from the floor below tore Clare away from her thoughts, jumping yet again at the sound. After turning off her bedroom light and checking herself for what was quite possibly the fiftieth time in the mirror, she descended the stairs to the living room.

There, it was impossible to tune out the bitter exchange of words between her parents, annoyance and concern rippling through her in equal quantities at the sight of them. Clearing her throat as obnoxiously as she could in the midst of their heated debate, they finally turned to face her, almost surprised by the fact that she'd even entered the room.

"_Hi_, I'm your daughter, Clare. Remember me?" she asked rhetorically, not at all remorseful for taking a tone with the pair.

"Not right now, Clare. I already get enough of a smart mouth from your father, I'm sure that's where you got it from." her mother, Helen, snapped, rolling her eyes at her father, Randall.

He wasn't without a rebuttal, Clare's heart sinking into the pit of her stomach as she realized she'd only given them more ammunition to work with.

"From me? Seriously? We both know what's a lie, not to mention the fact that if you think _Clare's _bad, you really need to reevaluate _yourself._" he barked back.

As the volume of their words only increased to a deafening degree, Clare eventually lost her cool, her eyes beginning to sting behind her closed lids.

"Stop!" she yelled over their voices, adrenaline tunneling through her as she began to tremble slightly. "I need a ride to school." she forced out, her voice shaking. "Can one of you please just drive me there?"

After a moment of silence, her dad finally relented, grabbing his car keys off the hook and gesturing for her to follow him out to the driveway. Clare murmured a low "bye" to her mom on the way out, only returned with a curt wave.

The ride to school was an uncharacteristically quiet one, Clare keeping her mouth shut for fear of fanning the flames any more than she already had for her parents. Instead of making conversation, her focus drifted to the digits ticking dutifully on her wrist, a small smile curling her lips up.

**0010d 16h 25m 48s**

* * *

Eli's low expectations for the day hadn't been going unfulfilled, fourth period passing by in practically a blur. The school staff was nice enough, each teacher more than willing to show him around and be patient while he adapted to the new settings, but Eli was sure it was all first day phoniness regardless. The students there didn't differ at all from what he was anticipating, cliques visible in every corner of the building. He knew he'd never fit into one, and didn't want to either, internally scoffing at even the mere thought of acquiring a steady group of friends. Loner was his general setting, one he'd become all too comfortable with over time. Being surrounded by new people wasn't likely to change that innate tendency.

Fifth period brought about lunch, a blank sort of indifference hitting him at the prospect of being around so many other students as the new kid. Already he'd gotten several looks from people around him, ranging from curious to blatantly nosy or rude. The latter ones amused him more than anything, always making sure to shoot back a grin in return. Eli knew how unapproachable he was; it was a trait he openly prided himself on. From his vantage point, it weeded out the few people that could be worth befriending from the ones who would simply be a waste of time and energy. The list of those people seemingly began and ended with one person, but Eli fought off the temptation to get carried away in thoughts of her. This wasn't the time or place.

The lunch line was excruciatingly long, so lengthy that Eli nearly decided to forgo eating at all, but the incessant rumbling in his stomach persuaded him to stick it out. After grabbing a burger and an apple he wasn't entirely sure was even edible, he retired himself to a table in the corner of the wide room, nearest to the exit. All around him was constant chattering, no one conversation discernible from the rest. He felt like he was covered in camouflage, blending in perfectly with the backdrop behind him. It suited him just fine, content to dig out the latest copy of _The Goon_ from his bag and flip through it. Though he'd already read it over at least four times, he never tired of the series, immersing himself back into the plot effortlessly.

Only after twenty minutes of steady reading and only intermittent breaks to eat was Eli torn from his secluded reverie, feeling a presence hanging over him on the opposite side of the table. Slowly lifting his gaze, his brows furrowed in confusion at the face before him, taking a moment before lowering the comic book.

"Can I help you?" he asked pointedly, briefly taking in the boy. He looked slightly younger than Eli but most definitely taller, a smile of curiosity painting his lips, with a beanie holding down a mop of brown hair. His appearance seemed more youthful than most for a reason Eli couldn't quite pinpoint, all smooth contours and innocent features. It was almost a pleasant sight in comparison to the motley population that the rest of the school consisted of, this boy differing from them.

"Is that The _Goon_?' the boy asked, his voice matching the innocence that his outward appearance suggested. "The latest edition?"

Shaking his head subtly to himself, he tried to wrap his head around the fact that someone was speaking to him at all, eventually returning his focus to the boy. "Yeah, I just got it the other day and I've already flown through it multiple times." he replied.

It wasn't everyday that someone – let alone a complete stranger – expressed an interest in the same things he liked. It led Eli to feel inclined to actually mingle, as mind-blowing and unlikely as that was.

"Oh dude! You're so lucky, I haven't been able to get my hands on it yet. I'm still stuck on that crazy cliffhanger from the last one." he lamented, huffing out a short breath. Pulling up a chair, he took a seat beside Eli, only pausing after getting comfortable. "Oh, um, I guess I should have asked if you even minded me sitting here first."

"It's...fine, yeah." Eli mumbled, still puzzled by the friendly stranger who apparently found his company desirable. It was enough to make him question the boy's sanity, if he were being honest with himself.

"But yeah," the boy started up once more, quickly recovering from his social faux pas and diving right back into his rant about the comic. "I'm seriously getting more and more impressed with each new one. The art insane and then like, the plot itself is addicting as hell." he spoke animatedly, as if this wasn't the first time he was speaking to Eli at all. "I'm Adam, by the way. Adam Torres." he followed up, smiling with enthusiasm.

"Uh," Eli stuttered briefly, lifting his brows in genuine shock at his forwardness. More shocking was the fact that he didn't find it at all off-putting.

It didn't take much to annoy Eli, even the simplest of requests to converse turning him off at once. He was antisocial to his core, all attempts on his parent's behalves to make him more personable failing miserably. The fact that someone was sincerely capturing his attention was nothing short of miraculous, and he knew better than to refuse it.

"Eli. Eli Goldsworthy." he responded, following the same format Adam had used to introduce himself.

Nodding his head in acknowledgment, Adam reached for his backpack and withdrew from it a paper bag, beginning to speak again as he dug through the contents. "I thought I was honestly seeing things when I looked at you and saw the cover. Every time I bring out my comics in public, I always get crap for it. As if they aren't good literature."

"I couldn't care less what people think about my preferences in reading material." Eli shrugged, biting into his apple – which he had deduced wasn't necessarily fresh but wouldn't kill him to eat either.

Unwrapping his sandwich, Adam didn't bother to chew with his mouth closed or wait to speak again until he was done, instead carrying on without a care. "Yeah, well, it's hard being the new kid and being branded a geek right off the bat."

Looking up towards him, Eli tilted his head. "You're new here too?"

Adam finally forced himself to swallow, his expression a mixture of relief and surprise. "I'm seriously glad I'm not the only one. My brother and I just transferred here. Kind of a long story but to sum it up, coming here wasn't really my choice."

"Likewise." Eli responded, settling back more comfortably in his chair and stretching out his legs beneath the table.

In almost no time at all, Adam had Eli caught in a discussion about everything ranging from their old schools, to bands they had in common, (a topic Eli felt especially invested in), eventually coming to a head with a debate of Marvel versus DC when the bell rang for sixth period.

"What's your next class?" Adam asked, pulling his backpack up his arm as he got up from his chair.

"Economics. I'm just _itching_ to get there." he mumbled, his disdain for the subject palpable. "And you?"

"English. My schedule isn't too shabby this year, I gotta say."

Following Adam as they made their way out of the door, the two walked down the hall, eventually reaching a fork. "That makes one of us. I'm heading this way." he spoke, gesturing in the opposite direction that the other boy was heading.

"Oh, wait," Adam said, slowing his stride. "Do you think we could like, I don't now, eat lunch together sometimes? You're honestly the only person around here with good taste in comics and just about everything else. You're practically a unicorn as far as I'm concerned."

Scoffing at his absurd comparison, Eli shrugged his shoulders, then nodding his head. "Yeah, I don't see why not." he said, offering the boy a small smile. "I'll be seeing you around then."

"See you tomorrow!" Adam replied before turning the opposite corner, disappearing into the crowd of students hurrying to their classes.

Despite his own reservations about befriending people, Eli couldn't deny that a small sense of promise had filled him, making him think that maybe Degrassi wouldn't be quite as miserable and pointless as he'd previously chalked it up to be.

* * *

"You should have been there, oh my god, Clare, you really need to transfer into my History class. The cutest guy in the whole school sits right in front of me." Alli chattered lively, Clare listening while she sipped occasionally on her SoBe. As much as Clare was grateful to have her best friend in the same lunch period, she knew without having to ask that a lengthy rundown of everything Alli had seen and done was sure to follow. It was a labor of love, one that she would willingly accept to be in the company of someone as amazing as Alli.

"His name is Drew Torres, and he's literally just, _ugh_," Alli continued, tossing her head back in frustration. "It should be a sin to look that gorgeous."

"I'm sure he's a masterpiece." Clare quipped back, rolling her eyes playfully at Alli's misery. "Did you get into that chemistry class you were hoping for?" she asked, glancing over at her.

"But I didn't get a good look at his timer. I didn't want to crane over his shoulder and blatantly stare. Because that would have given me away immediately. The last thing I need is to make Drew think I'm this huge creeper on the first day of school."

Realizing she wasn't going to get a reply to her question, Clare allowed the mindless banter to carry on, figuring she could fit in the important questions once Alli eventually exhausted herself.

"For all I know, we have the very same number ticking on our wrists and I'm here just wasting time!"

Pausing, Clare's mouth pressed into a thin line, unsure of how to phrase her thoughts to Alli. "Don't you think if you were soul mates, your timers would have gone off?" she asked, trying not to force disappointment into Alli with her concern.

"I didn't actually _meet _him. We didn't make eye contact. It's once you make eye contact that things happen." she replied matter-of-factly, shaking her head to Clare. "There's still a chance. I just have to get him to talk to me."

Clare knew that Alli was wrong; that even being near the person with a matching timer would make them both reach zero, and Alli's was still stuck at her eighteenth birthday. Her idealism was verging on pathetic, but she couldn't blame her for the optimism. She was equally as eager to meet her other half, her mind always running through possible scenarios for the big day.

"Aren't you curious about who it's going to be for you?" Alli queried, a small whine in her voice. "Your date is coming up so soon. It's literally going to happen this_ year_. In..." she trailed off, abruptly reaching for Clare's wrist and checking the counter. "_Ten_ days? Already?"

Sheepishly, Clare withdrew her arm, crimson sweeping over her cheeks as she smiled. "I'm really nervous, but I can't stop thinking about it. It's practically _all_ I think about."

"It could be someone in this room right now. Someone watching as their timer ticks down too. Just waiting to meet you." Alli beamed, reaching for Clare again and letting out a soft squeal.

Cringing just slightly at Alli's blatant excitement, she felt her face only heating up more, shaking her head in spite of herself. "It's like...I've waited my whole life for this. I almost feel like whoever it's going to be, I've missed them this entire time. Even if I don't know them, they've been on my mind so often." Clare moused, a wistful sigh leaving her.

Alli echoed it back, her shoulders rising and falling once she exhaled. "But you listen here, Clarebear. Soul mate or no, he still has to get my approval, got it? I don't care what some timer says about it." she warned, wagging her finger with mock conviction behind it.

"I know, I know. I'll make sure to get your blessing."

After saying their goodbyes at the sound of the bell, Clare exited the cafe and started down along the hall to her next class, the swarm of students beginning to thin out as each wandered into different classrooms. The air of mystery and excitement enshrouding the school year hadn't let up in the least, the sensation only doubling inside of her with Alli's words.

Whoever it would be, he really did have to be around somewhere close, wandering the very same halls she was, their clocks ticking in unison until the time would come for them to wind down to zero.


	2. We Used To Wait

**Hi again! Just a quick blurb before we dive into the chapter. To everyone who reviewed, liked/reblogged my post on tumblr, or even just stopped by to read, thank you so much! It was extremely encouraging to see people were interested and I missed writing multi-chapter fics so much. **

**Enjoy the next chapter, and feel free to leave a review with your thoughts!**

* * *

Eli could count on one hand how many people he'd befriended in his seventeen years.

While some might have considered that a failure on his part to effectively communicate with others, even that small number was a significant accomplishment to him. For someone who was so deeply introverted- the trait all but flowing through his veins- opening up to another person enough to befriend them was a difficult task. It made the fact that he was currently on his way to Adam Torres' house for a day of gaming almost impossible to believe.

Drumming his fingers absentmindedly against the steering wheel, Eli couldn't help feeling as though the past week had been a snippet out of another person's life. His parents had been pleasantly surprised, (relieved, more so, but it made Eli feel slightly less pathetic to use the former term) to see he hadn't come home from his first day with a black eye decorating his face, or a panic attack on his hands. He knew they'd been expecting the worst, and rightfully so, but the day hadn't been unkind to him.

Between becoming accustomed to the layout of Degrassi and situating himself in his classes, he'd been far too occupied to dwell on anything negative. The added fact that he'd even managed to make an acquaintance in the process brought the day into miraculous territory, both of his parents overjoyed to hear the fact.

The invite to Adam's house hadn't gone without several attempts of avoidance and decline, Eli insisting to him that he had things to do over the weekend that were so urgent, he couldn't possibly spare a few hours to hang out with him. But Adam wouldn't hear any of it, simply sending him the address and imploring him to show up.

He still felt completely rusty to the concept of friendship, almost to the point where he wasn't sure how he'd spend more than forty minutes with the boy without turning him off entirely to the idea of spending time together. But Adam made it easy to converse, all but dominating the discussion if he was allowed to ramble on and on. It was something Eli didn't mind in the least like others might, more than happy to let the boy prattle on. Their interests were mutual in several respects, a refreshing change of pace for the boy who felt alienated from his peers more often than not.

His rational side was telling him that this meet up would go fairly painlessly, far less traumatizing than he was envisioning at the very least. Though it was hard to believe, things were looking up for Eli just a little so far, and he would have been lying if he said he wasn't afraid he would ruin it.

Arriving at the address Adam had texted him earlier in the day, Eli parked his vintage hearse, Morty as he was named, just outside of the home. He locked it up and made his way along the walk path to the door, taking in the property before making a move to knock. It was just as he'd expected; a suburban-looking house smack dab in the middle of a suburban neighborhood.

The fact didn't surprise Eli in the slightest, already having assumed that the boy was from a well-adjusted family, despite his inability to chew with his mouth closed or allow anyone else to finish their sentence before interjecting.

It was a contrast to his own family, one he knew didn't fit the conventional mold for how a household operated, but Eli chalked their friendship compatibility up to happenstance. He was becoming grateful for Adam's boldness in approaching him initially, finding that the day was easier to get through knowing he'd have an enjoyable distraction halfway through it.

Rapping his knuckles on the wooden door, he took a step back, awaiting an answer. As the door swung open, Adam hardly noticed Eli standing before him, his eyes fixed instead on the conspicuous beast of a vehicle behind him.

"You drive _that?_" he gawked, peering from Eli to the hearse, as if thought his compact body simply couldn't drive something so much larger than he was.

"I need something to keep the dead bodies in, don't I?" Eli retorted, a light scoff leaving him. He was more than used to the reaction to his beloved car, seeing ones ranging from utter horror to morbid curiosity – quite literally.

Recovering from his shock, Adam rolled his eyes, stepping to the side of the door to allow Eli in. "Hardy har, someone's just as morbid outside school as he is in."

"What you see is what you get." Eli rebutted smoothly, giving a small shrug of his shoulders.

Adam gave a dismissive wave, already becoming used to Eli's typically snarky sense of humor. "Yeah, yeah. I know. I've got the Xbox hooked up in the basement, let's head down."

As he led the way, Eli followed wordlessly behind, only halting as Adam paused along the staircase. He bumped against the taller boy's back as he stopped, fumbling and then regaining his balance.

"Drew? Are you down here?" Adam called out, noticing the TV screen light glowing within the otherwise darkened room.

"Yeah, what do you want?" a male voice called out, Eli quickly realizing that it was his brother. Adam hadn't gone into explicit detail about his family or the reasons why they moved, only saying that he and Drew were step-brothers. Despite that, it was clear that shared a deep bond, something Eli couldn't help but admire considering the lack of blood relation.

Adam huffed out in exasperation, continuing down along the rest of the way."I told you I was having company over."

Rounding the corner, Eli could just make out a figure lounging on a couch a few feet away, a video game controller in hand and bag of chips at his side.

"So...? I got here first. You can't go complaining to mom since she isn't even here. Go use the TV upstairs."

"The Xbox is set up down here, and that's what we were going to use."

Eli shifted uncomfortably in his spot as the two brothers quarreled, feeling like a third party onlooker more than anything.

After a moment of what he assumed was internal debate, Drew finally relented, groaning as he got up from the couch and stood to his feet.

"Fine, but as soon as you guys are done here, I'm starting up my game again." he grumbled, handing Adam the controller briskly.

"Whoa," Adam mumbled, grasping the controller and then grabbing Drew's arm before it had the chance to return to his side. "Your counter..."

"Oh, that. Yeah." he replied, his tone offhand and aloof.

Eli's brows knitted together, not understanding what Adam meant until he stepped to the side for a better view, noticing the absence of the device in his wrist.

Stupefied, Adam took a moment to collect himself before speaking. "You didn't tell me the day was coming up."

Shrugging, Drew stretched his arms over his head, letting out a loud yawn. "It's not like I want a soul mate anyway. And luckily the girl I got doesn't really want one either."

It caught Eli's attention immediately that for once, someone wasn't entirely fixated on the idea of their counter and who would be on the receiving end of it, generally feeling like an anomaly for how little attention he paid to the device.

"Wait, so you don't really care that you met her?" Eli interjected, too curious about his take on things not to ask, regardless of the fact that they'd never spoken before.

"Not really, no. I mean, she's hot as hell, so that helps but do I actually see myself being with her?" he asked rhetorically, snorting as he shook his head. "She's not interested in a relationship and neither am I. Especially not one that we'd apparently be stuck in for the rest of our lives. Long term stuff is a drag. I'm not about that."

Drew's apathy wasn't along the same vein as Eli's necessarily, but it was comforting to hear his take on it; realizing that perhaps he wasn't so unusual for putting little to no stock in the entire process. He didn't understand how people could blindly put all of their faith into a gimmick that could easily be fictional, just a lie fed to people so consistently and convincingly that they had no other choice but to believe.

Of all things humans seemed starved and greedy for, even above that of wealth and status, love ranked the highest. It was the most logical thing to prey upon, and Eli's skepticism felt warranted when he considered how easy it would have been to fool people into the idea of a fairytale love story.

It was a genius concept, really. But he knew there was no end in sight to the tradition with its longevity. All the same, he wasn't about to resign himself to the same beliefs.

Adam, thoroughly bewildered and taken aback by the situation, wasn't feeling quite as understanding as Eli. "So that's it? You met her, you two don't really like each other and want to play the field, so you're not going to give it a shot?"

"I never said we didn't like each other." Drew corrected, Eli sensing a 'but' following closely after, "But we're not about to confess our devotion to each other. She doesn't date. And frankly, I don't want to either. I'm QB1 this year, at a new school. I'd be crazy to just stick with the first girl who comes up."

Shaking his head bitterly, Adam crossed his arms about his front. "You're such an idiot. You got to meet her so early. Not everyone's that lucky." he mumbled, his tone growing more agitated as he went on.

"I know it's gotta be hard waiting, but trust me, this entire thing is overrated, Adam. You'll see that when it happens for you." he assured, clapping his hand on his brother's back as he started towards the staircase. "But hey," he started again, turning back to face Eli and Adam. "She brought me down to the boiler room like, ten minutes after we met. At least I got something out of the whole thing." he grinned, continuing up along the stairs and into the living room.

Once the door shut, Eli returned his focus to Adam, sensing the irritation still hanging in the room between them.

"Drew always has it so easy, he doesn't even get that. Everything gets handed to him, he doesn't have to work for anything except football. And even then, it comes naturally to him."

The pair took a seat on the couch where Drew had been lying moments before, Adam distractedly setting up the game for them to play.

"Do you mind if I ask how long you have to wait?" Eli queried, trying to breach the conversation delicately, knowing it was something of a sensitive issue for the boy.

A silence fell between them, one so long that it left him wondering if Adam simply wasn't going to answer at all.

"Twenty five years." he finally said, his gaze never leaving the TV screen as he navigated the menu list.

Had that number been the one displayed on Eli's arm, he knew it wouldn't have come as a disappointment to him. The amount of days or weeks or years held little to no weight for him, putting no belief in the entire system to begin with. He easily likened it to that of a child believing in Santa Claus – merely defending his existence because they _wanted_ to believe.

But to Adam, it meant having to wait eons longer than his peers to find his other half, wandering the world alone until the time came.

He could hardly imagine how it must have been for him as a kid, ten years prior, seeing thirty five years flickering back at him when his brother's was practically around the bend in the great scheme of things. It gave the term sibling rivalry a whole new meaning, one Eli wouldn't have wished on anyone.

Taking a moment to phrase his thoughts, he turned his head to glance at Adam. "I don't necessarily believe in the entire thing, but I know you do and I'm sure the wait is going to be worth it." he encouraged, grabbing his own controller while Adam began their game.

"You _what_?" Adam repeated, looking at him incredulously for the second time in under an hour. "First you drive a hearse like a morbid wackjob, and now you don't believe in soul mates? What planet are you from?"

With a short laugh, Eli shrugged, taking his confusion in stride. "I don't think it's possible to have a counter tell you who your soul mate will be."

"There's evidence to support it." Adam shot back, chewing on the inside of his cheek as he attempted to divide his focus between the game and talking. "Biological evidence, statistics over the years, accounts from scientists and psychologists that say it works. It has a ninety nine percent success rate."

"I must be that one percent that it doesn't pan out for then. I know mine is just a piece of crap embedded in my arm. Nothing monumental is going to happen when it goes off."

"When's yours?" asked Adam reflexively, the question segueing perfectly from Eli's last statement.

Though it was logical to ask, Eli immediately froze up at the inquiry, a sense of discomfort traveling up his spine and into his limbs. The date was something he kept to himself, even hiding it from his own awareness for a time up until recently. If his parents had done the math from when he was younger and knew, then Eli wasn't made privy to the fact, since the topic was scarce in the household. After Julia's death, the subject didn't bode well with him in the least. It was off limits to everyone, even more so with a person he'd just met a week prior.

"Doesn't matter." he answered curtly, hoping to deflect attention off of the subject. Eli's resistance was an unwavering thing when it needed to be, able to hold his ground up against even the most insistent of pestering. Adam wasn't going to get an answer out of him, he knew that for sure.

"Are you serious? Come on, man. I just spilled my pathetic guts to you about mine. You gotta tell me yours." he pleaded, going so far as to pause the game and turn his attention solely to Eli. "It can't be any worse than mine. And if it was, I'd just say I'm right here with you and maybe we'll both end up finding love when we're wrinkly and senile in a nursing home."

His comment brought a small chuckle out of Eli, but it didn't change the fact that this was one of the things that he flat-out refused to speak about with people, hardly even wanting to consider it inwardly himself.

"The day will come and go just like any other. It won't be remarkable. I won't encounter someone from across the room and lock eyes dramatically with them, as if there's no one else there. It's not going to happen like that. It's impossible. Even if it wasn't, I don't want any of that."

"They might be called soul mates, but they don't have to be as cliché as that, jeez. And you call yourself a writer." Adam chided, shaking his head. "You've got to be at least a little curious. What she's going to look like, if you two will have things in common or not..."

If Eli was being honest with himself, he had wondered, but the curiosity was always heavily outweighed by his own logic. It wouldn't allow him to entertain such ridiculous thoughts.

"No one in their right mind would fall in love with me. I wouldn't put them through that in the first place anyway, I don't care if some timer tells me I should." he said shortly, his patience wearing thin. "Can we get back to playing now?"

Adam stuffed the controller behind his back, evoking a groan of annoyance from Eli. "Not until you tell me the date."

Tipping his head back, Eli let out a hearty laugh, one that implied disbelief rather than amusement. "Why does this even matter to you? I keep saying I won't do anything about it, even when it happens."

"Then just tell me. If nothing's gonna happen, no harm in telling me, right?" Adam reasoned in return, quirking a challenging brow at him. It didn't matter that he had a point; Eli wasn't going to cave and do something that specifically rubbed him the wrong way. With a heavy shake of his head, he maintained his gaze at the boy, hoping at some point he'd grow bored of the debate and return to their game.

But Adam had other plans, his fast reflexes working in his favor as he suddenly reached for Eli's arm, gripping it firmly to pry off his bracelet.

"What the hell!?" Eli exclaimed, trying to tear his arm away from him. "I said no, can't you just accept that?"

"If you're not gonna tell me something as simple as this, I'm just going to find out for myself!" he rebutted, succeeding in unbuckling Eli's wristband a moment later. As it fell away, Adam kept his hold on his wrist just long enough to read the digits, his jaw dropping open once he relinquished his limb. Eli pulled his hand back and hastily fastened the bracelet back over the counter, disgusted at even the sight of it.

"Five days." Adam mumbled in awe, not so much a question but instead a pair of words he couldn't wrap his head around for the life of him.

"Nothing will happen. This piece of crap will go off, my life won't suddenly be changed, and I'll finally be able to get it removed like I've been wanting to all along."

It seemed Adam's resolve to argue back and forth had finally diminished, reaching for his controller and turning back towards the TV as he pressed play. Ten minutes of silent gameplay passed before Adam piped up again.

"But what if something _does_ happen? What then?"

Eli closed his eyes, inhaling deeply as he forced himself to humor the question, simply because Adam seemed so invested in the answer.

"Then I suppose I'll be eating my words once I fall in love with her. But it won't happen, so please drop it."

Satisfied with the reply, the rest of the afternoon went on as previously scheduled, but not without heavy consideration on Eli's part after Adam's interrogation. In the event that by some impossible occurrence, his timer would lead him to his soul mate by the time the last second counted down, was it something he would even be capable of handling?

* * *

"I'm thinking we should go with something pastel, something mild and sweet. Like you."

Clare smiled at her mom's comment, her head tilting downward bashfully. Though she had debated with her about their plans for the day, Helen had inevitably won out, all but pushing Clare into the car so they could go to the mall. It had been all her mother was focusing on during the week, which came as a relief in comparison to the perpetual argument going on between her parents. Anything beat listening to their back and forth battles, some of the cruelest words Clare had ever heard being shared between them. It only grew worse with each passing day, but the distraction couldn't have come at a better time.

"You like yellow, don't you?" Helen asked, holding a lightweight spring dress just in front of Clare. "It's a little bright though."

Nodding in agreement, Clare wandered off to the opposite side of the clothes rack, her small fingers separating each article of clothing to peek through them. She had more than enough clothes at home, nearly enough dresses to wear a different one every day of the week for a whole month, but her mother had insisted on picking out something special for _the date_.

Even with the beginning of school weighing heavily enough on her mind, Clare's primary thought process centered around the days ticking down, only five left until she'd be face to face with her soul mate. She found it comical that her mom was almost as excited about the entire ordeal as she was, anticipating what kind of boy it would be on the other end.

The closer the date came, the less she could wrap her mind around it, the closeness of it feeling surreal to Clare. Her parents, aunts and uncles, and even her grandparents on both sides had experienced success with their timers, going on to have loving families from there. She came from a long line of soul mates, which made it all the more intimidating to consider how the meeting with hers would go.

Clare couldn't be sure how everyone viewed her, but she couldn't readily claim to have any enemies, her disposition usually cheery and personable. On the whole, she enjoyed the company of others and made it a goal to befriend as many people as possible. The tendency never let her down in the way of friends, but she couldn't claim to have any experience with relationships. Of all her crushes, only one had stuck, but even that one was fleeting at best.

It never occurred to her to attempt seriously dating someone prior to entering grade ten, knowing that it would only be a waste once her counter ran out. It wouldn't have been fair to commit to a boy, only to find that he wasn't the right match after all. Clare didn't understand how anyone could settle with a person who wasn't their soul mate; how they could handle the uncertainty of what was to come.

Aside from the unrelenting fear of losing her soul mate before ever getting a chance to meet them, she also feared being disliked by them. Though her parents and friends assured her that it wasn't likely—perhaps even impossible- to dislike her as a person, Clare's fears weren't diminished, the insecurity only becoming more prominent as she drew closer to the date.

Her attention had drifted long enough for her mom to pick out six dresses, her eyes widening in surprise as they were thrust into her hands.

"Try these ones on, see which one fits best." she instructed, gesturing in the direction of the dressing room.

Walking herself into the changing area, Clare picked a small cubicle and closed the door behind her, settling the hangers on a hook to her left. "Can you tell me about how your timer went off when you met Dad again?" she called through the door to her mom, beginning to take off her shirt and pants.

"Oh, Clare. It was years ago now, practically a lifetime with how fast time flies. I can't remember every detail anymore. I've told it to you a dozen times already." Helen replied, her voice sounding from just outside the door.

"Please?"

It took a moment for Helen to comply, Clare taking the opportunity to slide one of the first dresses over her head. It fit her nicely but came up just a little too short for her liking, her nose scrunching in distaste as she imagined herself trying with little success to bend over politely in it. Shrugging herself out of it, she returned it to the hanger, smiling as her mom finally began to recount the story.

"It was a Sunday in the spring, May twenty third. I woke up in the morning knowing it would be the day, which surprised me since the time coincided with an event we were holding after service. I almost talked myself out of going, simply because I couldn't imagine running into my soul mate there, of all places."

"But you went to the event, didn't you?" Clare added, smiling widely as she tried on another dress, this one far too clingy for her tastes.

"I did, I did. The entire afternoon was tortuously slow, I almost didn't think the time would ever come."

Clare could feel her own heart warming as she envisioned the moment, even if she hadn't been there to experience it herself. "When did you two see each other?"

Helen paused for a moment, emitting a soft sigh to herself. "It was right as we were packing up-"

"I thought your timer went off during the beginning of the event?" Clare interrupted, furrowing her brows in confusion at the mix up in her mom's story.

With a laugh, Helen began to speak again. "Oh, no, you're right. See? The years really do make the memory blurry." she joked. "I was caught up in the middle of setting things up, arranging tables and making sure the raffle tickets were in order, so much so that I nearly forgot the moment was coming. I didn't even have a chance to panic like I thought I would." she said, her tone soaked in nostalgia.

Shimmying into the last dress of the pile, a floral design with a flattering scoop neckline, Clare swayed slightly in it, seeing how it fit her from every angle. "And there he was?"

"There he was." her mother repeated, Clare able to hear the smile in her voice. "I thought it was too good to be true. We caught sight of each other and eventually the timers stopped beeping. He..." she trailed off, Clare waiting impatiently for her to finish her sentiment. "He was it. I just knew. Even if our timers hadn't been there to tell us so, I would have known. I could feel it."

Hearing her mother speaking so fondly of her dad made Clare equal parts elated and saddened, still confused as to how such a perfect love story could go so horrible awry years down the line. Soul mates weren't meant to argue and grow resentful of one another, or so she always heard from those around her.

She understood that all marriages had rough patches, but the one her parents had been up against felt more like a tidal wave, steadily crashing down on them until nothing remained in the wreckage.

"...You still love dad, right?" she questioned softly, looking down at her bare feet in the changing room.

"Of course I do, sweetie. Soul mates are forever." Helen answered swiftly, easing the sense of rising dread in Clare's stomach instantly. Things would surely be okay, even if it took a while for the pair of them to find their way back to each other. She had unwavering faith in the fact.

Taking another look in the full length mirror before her, Clare sighed happily at the way the current dress felt on her, a surge of excitement for when she would wear it already coursing through her. "I think this is the dress, Mom." she announced, opening the door and stepping out to show her.

"Oh my, yes. This is definitely it. A perfect fit. You look beautiful, Clare." she praised, cupping her daughter's face dotingly in her hands. "Whoever this boy is, he's going to know how lucky he is right away."

Clare could feel heat sweeping over her cheeks over the mere thought of seeing him for the first time, hoping she measured up to whatever expectations he'd have. Her mind was open to whoever it would be, and hoped his would be as well.

Stepping back into the dressing room, she carefully removed the dress and put her own clothes back on, working on her shoes as her mom called through the door again.

"I also want you to invite him over for dinner after school is over. Your father and I want to meet him."

Clare's jaw fell open slightly mid-shoe tying. "_Right_ after I meet him?"

"Why not? Getting an early jump on it couldn't hurt, right? My mom met your father shortly after we met. It's a nice way of getting to know him, seeing how he fits into the family."

The thought didn't sit well with Clare, already feeling bad for whatever poor, unsuspecting boy it would be. She knew without having to ask that the dinner would be more of an interrogation than anything, her mother an expert at needling people with critical questions. She'd been on the receiving end of it more times than she preferred to reflect on, and it never ended well.

It would be her luck to chase away her soul mate immediately after meeting him because of her overbearing parents, she reasoned.

"I guess I can invite him over. I just hope that won't seem too rushed."

"Clare-bear, you're not asking the poor boy to marry you just hours after meeting each other. A dinner is nothing. If he's a good, respectable boy from a nice family, he'll agree in a heartbeat. We'll all enjoy ourselves, don't worry." she assured, though it didn't put a dent in Clare's anxieties about the subject.

After leaving the small dressing room, dress in hand, Clare and her mom went to the check out line to pay for it. By the time they reached the parking lot, most of her nerves surrounding the dinner to come had subsided, replaced instead with her usual impatience for the time to come.

Entering the car, Clare pulled her seat belt over her torso, clicking it into place as her mom pulled out of the lot. The radio filled the silence between them until Helen spoke again.

"Your life is going to change after this. You know that, right?"

Nodding, Clare fiddled with the fabric of her pants, her gaze flitting from it to the scenery passing outside the window. "It's a little intimidating, meeting him so soon. I wouldn't want to wait an eternity, but I never realized how...surreal it would be."

Helen let out a small "mhmm" in reply, taking a turn that led back to their block.

"I just want it to be like you and dad. I want to know right away that he's the one for me. Even if it was a perfectly silent room, no counters and nothing to convince me otherwise. I want to feel it in my gut, that we're meant for each other."

Her mom took a moment to reply, pulling up to their driveway and parking there. Once she cut the ignition and removed her seat belt, she turned to Clare, grasping her hand. "You'll know." was all she answered with, offering a reassuring smile before opening her door and stepping out of the car.

Clare allowed herself to remain inside a little longer, withdrawing the dress she'd gotten from its bag.

In five days, a whole world she'd been dreaming about her entire life would finally be open to her. She could only hope her soul mate would be waiting just as impatiently to meet her as she was him.


	3. Hide and Seek

**Hello! I don't want to chat your ear off, but I do want to say thank you for the feedback! Every review made me smile, and a few even made me laugh, (more specifically CheapNovelty's; since yes, no clew in dis bitch, thank god) and they definitely made it easier to work through the mild block I was feeling.**

**Enjoy the chapter, and as always, feel free to share your thoughts!**

* * *

"_When your timer goes off, you're going to be face to face with the ugliest girl in the entire universe."_

_He didn't dispute it, since anyone would have paled in comparison to her. Between the dark raven locks that framed her face- even when her hair was haphazard- to her pale skin that contrasted it perfectly, Eli had already donned Julia with the title of goddess. _

_There was no comparison to be made to any other woman on Earth, in his eyes. The timer wouldn't tell him anything he couldn't already surmise on his own. _

_The fact that it hadn't gone off when the two first met felt like an error to Eli, as though it was somehow faulty for not picking up on the fact that clearly, they were two halves of a whole. Despite the supposed accuracy that others credited it with, he knew there had to be something irrefutably wrong with the device for not seeing what he could feel so thoroughly in his bones. She was it, there was no question._

"_She might just blind me with how repulsive she is." he added, smirking as he looked up through his lashes at her._

"_She'll be an ogre for sure, that's just your luck."_

_Scoffing, Eli dipped his head back out from under the hood of his hearse, returning to the driver's seat. With little more than false hope and minimal knowledge of vehicle repair, he turned the key in the ignition, a sigh of relief emitting from his lips when the engine roared to life._

_Julia returned to the passenger's side after shutting the hood, sliding in beside him with a mischievous smile painting her features. _

"_She'll probably be terrible in bed too."_

"_As if I'd touch someone that revolting with a two foot pole, jeez. Give me some credit." Eli joked back, fiddling with the radio as he readied himself to drive them both home. _

_The car had been idled on the side of the road for twenty five minutes after it had stalled on the way back from school, a normal occurrence when it came to the beat up hearse. But Julia never minded the few extra minutes he would have to take in order to get it up and running, never failing to make the task of fixing it that much less frustrating._

_He could see her gaze drifting towards her wrist, the playful grin quickly curling down into a taut, pensive frown._

"_I only have a week left." she said quietly, though Eli already knew how long she had until the timer on her arm went off. _

_It wasn't a conversation either of them liked to have, but he'd been checking it just as compulsively as she had lately. With every number that ticked down from it, dread began to rise like bile in the back of his throat, and Eli knew it was only a matter of time before he wound up choking on it. _

_The inevitability of it all was what kept him up at night, his arms locked tightly around her, as if he could do a single thing to delay it._

_With a hopeful smile on his face, Eli reached towards her, ensnaring her smaller hand in his. "It doesn't have to mean anything." His thumb dragged comfortingly across her knuckles, trying to ease out the tension there. "That thing can't tell us anything we don't already know. It's just a fluke that ours weren't matched up."_

"_But what if it wasn't?" she shot back quickly, rattling Eli enough with its unexpectedness that he didn't have a reply. _

_It hadn't ever crossed his mind that Julia could believe they weren't meant to be; that they came stamped with an expiration date from the very start. Their relationship hadn't been a time killer or a way to entertain himself for the past two years. He felt his heart starting to ram around with abandon in his chest, the situation so unreal to him that he could barely believe it was happening._

"_What do you mean what if it wasn't?"_

"_What if you're not my soul mate?"_

The loud honking of a nearby car wrenched Eli from his deep reverie, jumping in his spot as his attention jerked to the present. He was seated in the parking lot of the school, the warning bell mere minutes away. Lifting his hands to his face, he rubbed his eyes until they felt sore, taking a small comfort in the burn.

All too often he felt himself pulled into memories of Julia, each one only made stranger with each time he envisioned it. He'd been trying to train himself not to dwell on her, attempting to stay completely absorbed in the moment but for someone as deeply nostalgic and guilty as Eli tended to be, it simply wasn't possible.

The school week might have kept him busy enough that he didn't have time to let his thoughts get the best of him, but it wasn't meant to last long. The brief reprieve eventually made way for more ruminating, unnerving thoughts, his mind so wired to reflect on the past that he didn't know how to process anything happening in the present.

It was one of the reasons why his parents had been so insistent on starting him up at a new school. He didn't have the heart to tell them that it wasn't panning out as they'd hoped thus far. A new setting couldn't erase everything that had already come to pass, or the fact that Eli felt as though something crucial and irreplaceable had been ripped from him in the process.

In truth, he nearly hadn't shown up to school, if only to defy whatever fate would surely be coming to him during the day. It still didn't feel real to him at all, but there was no disputing the fact that his arm read 0000d 05h 45m 17s. He'd done the math, and it seemed as though the time would fall during his English class.

It struck him as odd that it could occur in a place he'd already been several times before, but he wouldn't let himself mull it over too much. After all, the likelihood of anything happening at all rested extremely close to zero. He knew the class would go on without anything life-changing happening, just as he'd always known it would.

It didn't serve any purpose to linger in his hearse well after the initial bell to enter, but it felt like the only sense of control he could grasp for the time being. Whatever the day had in store, he wasn't anxious to get a head start on it.

At the end of the day, he would return to his hearse just the same as he always did. Unchanged, unfazed, and alone.

* * *

Each of Clare's footfalls echoed far louder in her own ears than it did down the hall, entering through the double doors of the school. She was acutely aware of everything around her, so much so that even the smallest of sounds were a major distraction to her.

Though neurotic was a trait she would honestly- albeit reluctantly- attach to herself, paranoia didn't factor in with it. She knew why she was on edge more so than on any other day, even though it wasn't anywhere near time for her to be concerned. There were still hours to wait, each minute seeming to drag on longer now that the big day had finally arrived. It was impatience in its most undiluted, genuine form that was filling Clare to the brim.

The fact that she'd built up this very moment for the past fifteen years of her life didn't help matters either, imagining it happening in so many ways that she worried it would inevitably fall short of her expectations.

It wasn't only her romanticism talking, but her insecurity that her soul mate would find a fault in her at once. Clare never considered herself the prettiest or most sophisticated of girls, instead priding herself on things like her intelligence and compassion. To her, those traits were fall less commonplace, and more worthy of appreciation than anything else.

But she understood the scope of acknowledgment in the typical adolescent male – hot girls, sports, and undoubtedly girls yet again. It gave her sound reason to stress over the situation.

Someone like Alli wouldn't have any reason to worry when her time came, inhabiting a natural charm and knack for flirtation with boys. Try as she might have to emulate it, Clare knew it wasn't a skill that could simply be learned. She wasn't innately alluring, and while she didn't consider that a genuine flaw, it did leave her concerned over how likely her soul mate was to reject her

All in all, she had been trying to convince herself that her other traits, though deeper than the surface, would shine through enough to appeal to whoever it would be. After all, she'd read more classic novels than most girls would ever bother to, (ones by Charlotte Bronte more than once) and was in the top of her class. Even if her humor was slightly corny and her athletic ability left much to be desired, her talents would make up in other areas where she was severely lacking. She was only human; something no decent person could fault her for.

Making her way down the hall, Clare smoothed out her dress, once more grateful for the decision to buy it. It might have been ridiculous to rely on a new piece of clothing for confidence, but the garment was loaning her some previously unowned courage. She turned the corner before arriving at her locker a few seconds later, her mind blanking as she tried to unlock it.

Eyebrows furrowed, she let out a muffled groan of frustration, narrowing her gaze at the lock. She hadn't ever forgotten the combination before, her hands usually working from muscle memory alone to undo the metal contraption. But in the flurry of her already cluttered mind, it was no real surprise that other facts were falling by the wayside.

Still struggling five minutes later, Clare felt a surge of panic course through her as the warning bell rang out, not wanting to be late for her first class which, much to her dismay, had the most strict teacher she'd been assigned for the semester. It was just her luck that she would find herself fiddling fruitlessly with a lock that she'd seemingly forgotten the combination for on such a huge day. Everything was about timing, and Clare didn't want to disrupt the flow of how things would play out.

Her small fingers toyed hurriedly with the dial, eventually hearing a telling click as the piece of metal gave way. With a sigh, Clare made haste to grab her books for her first few classes, shoving it closed once she was finished.

All seemed to be back on track, the last bell signaling for class to begin still waiting to go off until she heard a slam from just behind her, followed by a throaty laugh.

Turning, Clare's expression immediately turned to one of disbelief, watching as two guys shoved another boy repeatedly into a locker .

Though Clare couldn't claim she had a lot of confidence in her appearance, one thing she did embody was a strong sense of right and wrong. It didn't matter that she disliked confrontation when faced with a situation where someone was getting battered. Without thinking, she stormed up to the boys, quickly putting herself between the attackers and the victim.

"Do you guys really have nothing better to do than pick on people?" she exclaimed, flinching slightly as the taller of the two boys pulled his hand back in just enough time to avoid hitting her. She was well aware that her gender was the only thing sparing her the hit, her insides sinking as she realized the boy behind her would have taken the impact instead.

The main aggressor was about three or four heads taller than Clare, a fact that didn't exactly comfort her, but she wasn't about to let the bully continue his pursuit against the boy.

His thin mouth pulled up into a cocky smirk, the expression alone enough to instill fear with how blatantly wicked it was.

"You expect us not to beat the crap out of you when you've got a girl sticking up for you? What kind of guy lets a chick defend him?" the boy gawked, earning a cackle out of his friend, a muscular brunette who donned a Degrassi Letterman jacket. "That's rich, Torres. You're only giving us more ammunition to make you our personal punching bag."

"_Go!_" Clare yelled, daring to take a step closer to them. "Just leave him alone!"

Throwing his hands up in mock surrender, the taller boy shrugged his shoulders as he backed away.

"Fine, you win this time, I'll listen to what the girl says. But she's not going to be able to save your ass next time, freak. We'll get you." he promised, nodding his head at his friend as the pair stalked off down the opposite end of the hall.

A beat later, the final bell rang, but Clare's attention was only on the victim of the entire fiasco.

Turning, she made eye contact with the boy they'd been attacking. He looked visibly shaken though he tried to collect himself while under her scrutiny, straightening out his button-up shirt and fixing the beanie that rested on his head.

"Are you okay?" Clare queried, her voice soft and comforting as she helped him gather his books off the floor.

The boy stuffed his belongings in his backpack, slinging it over his shoulders with a sigh. "How pathetic would it be if I said I was used to it?"

"Not pathetic, just preposterous. I can't believe people get away with that here. There's no enforcement for the anti-bullying rules. You can't set up consequences without putting them into effect when they're necessary."

"Yeah, well, tell that to the faculty here. I'm just trying to lie low so I don't make waves." he shrugged, to which Clare could only frown in return.

She knew how it felt to be picked on occasionally, but being the subject of cruel name-calling and physical abuse was far beyond anything she'd ever experienced. It broke her heart to witness, and unnerved her even more that someone would try to desensitize themselves to it.

Tugging her bag further up her arm, Clare didn't want to dispute the matter with the boy even though she wished he would be an advocate for himself. Surely he'd already gone through enough without her insistence that he should speak up.

"Thank you though." he said, smiling at her. "You're the first person who's done something like that for me besides my brother, I really owe you one."

"Nonsense. Anyone would have done the same—or should. No one deserves to be hurt like that."

A comfortable silence fell on the two before Adam spoke up again, his tone one of realization.

"We're in the same English class. You were the girl who brought in vampire fanfiction the other day, right?"

Clare couldn't refrain from groaning at the mere mention of her work from the day prior, still inwardly chiding herself for how poorly received it had been.

"Yes, but I'd prefer you not associate me with that mortifying decision." she implored, smiling bashfully in spite of herself. "I'm Clare."

"I'm Adam. We'll stick to Clare instead of Fortnight Girl like I was referring to you in my head, since you definitely saved my butt here."

With a playful roll of her eyes, she agreed, tucking a stray curl behind her ear.

"Much appreciated. I'm thinking I should hurry to class in the hopes that Mr. Perino will be merciful and not give me detention, but I'll see you in class!" she called, giving a wave before turning on her heels.

With any luck, the rest of the day would carry on without impromptu changes of plan, though Clare wasn't even remotely optimistic for the possibility.

* * *

Reluctantly, Eli had made his way into the school, an overwhelming urge to forgo the entire day hitting him square in the chest. If the timer were truly linked to fate or anything unavoidable at all, then the meeting would happen regardless of his choices, but he wasn't convinced of its validity anyway. He was ready to retreat right back to his car when he spotted Adam down the hall, the boy anxiously grabbing his belongings from his locker.

"So I'm not the only tardy one today." he called out to him, his voice echoing slightly in the otherwise empty hallway.

"This wasn't exactly the plan but then again, neanderthal assholes don't really care about my punctuality."

His phrasing caught Eli off guard, his hand gripping Adam's shoulder lightly to turn him. "'Assholes' being who, exactly?"

Adam shook his head, brushing off the topic too quickly for Eli's liking. He didn't take kindly to bullies, already having had several dozen run-ins with ones at his old school. Antagonizing them had already become something of an old but revered pastime of his.

Despite Cece and Bullfrog's insistence that it was time to turn over a new leaf, he wasn't about to retire himself from the task if it became necessary.

"It doesn't really matter. I'm used to them, and some girl actually stuck up for me this time. It was kinda cool, even though I know I'll get more crap from them next time about it." he dismissed, shaking his head once more as his locker slammed shut. "It's not like they're smart enough to understand reason anyway. I literally feel like I'm talking to a wall with those guys."

His explanation didn't placate Eli in the slightest, the scowl adorning his face only growing that much more sour.

"If you see these guys around when we're together, do me a favor and point them out, alright?"

Looking only slightly alarmed, Adam agreed, still unused to Eli's sense of unethical revenge. It was something he was sure his new friend would grow accustomed to, seeing as though it was becoming clear that the trait might come in handy once again.

The two began down the hall, taking their time walking since they were already unarguably late.

"So..." Adam started, segueing intentionally from their previous topic of conversation, "Big day, huh?" he asked, nudging his shoulder against Eli's.

"Don't remind me. I'm going to debunk this entire concept by the end of the day, mark my words. I'll go to English class, continue on with my day as previously scheduled and when this damn thing goes off, the only thing that will have changed in my life is that I'll forever be known as the guy who had his timer go off, and nothing happened. I can live with that stigma."

"Once again I feel entitled to guilt you about this." Adam interjected, clicking his tongue against the roof of his mouth. "At least yours is going off early in life. I'll be so old and gross by the time mine does, I wouldn't blame her if she doesn't even want me by then."

"Let's leave the pessimism to me, yes? I'm far better at it than you and though I sympathize with your plight, it'll be well worth the wait when the time comes. For me, this is simply a waste of time. A non-event, if you will."

The two reached their individual destinations, Eli's class just up the stairs while Adam's was a couple doors away.

Adam's smile turned to one of knowing mischief, his brows lifting in unison as he spoke. "When it goes off and you fall head over heels for this girl, I'm going to laugh _so hard_ at you. Expect a million 'I-told-you-so's', since I know I'm gonna be right."

"You mean when nothing happens, you'll be feeling like an idiot for claiming anything would, right. Easy mistake to make." Eli countered, smirking smugly at the boy.

He turned away and started up the staircase, making his way into his classroom almost completely unnoticed. It was just as usual, the day going on thus far without much ado. He was one hundred percent certain that it would carry on in the same manner, defiantly ignoring the time displayed on his wrist for the next three classes.

* * *

With much persistence from Alli, Clare had relented in her effort to have them eat outside for the day, the weather temperate enough to justify the change of scenery.

She was still working to ensure that nothing she did during the day was different than her normal routine, but it took an unwaveringly firm person to refuse Alli's whining. Clare simply didn't have what it took, and thus found herself perched on a bench just outside the cafeteria.

It didn't help matters that Alli was currently in the midst of a mini-meltdown, one Clare couldn't muster up false surprise over.

"Can you hear that sound, Clare-bear?" she asked ominously, fixating on the group of popular kids seated just a few benches away from them. At the head of the table was Drew Torres, the source of Alli's current grief.

Clare took a moment to listen, narrowing her gaze as she turned to her friend in bewilderment.

"It's the sound of my heart shattering." she clarified, to which Clare could only grumble inwardly, realizing that she should have seen the melodramatic reply coming from a mile away. "If you look at his arm closely, you can see that his timer is missing." she continued, chock full of anguish. "And you know what that means."

Though Clare knew exactly what the absence implied, she decided not to take the bate this time, deciding to entertain herself with the girl's misery.

"And what would that be?"

"Oh come on, Clare! That timer didn't just up and walk away. It was taken out because obviously, it went off!" Alli exclaimed, burying her head in her hands while Clare nibbled on her sandwich occasionally.

"You don't know that. Maybe his is a special brand that has a mind of its own – complete with a pair of legs."

"Don't you sass me right now, Miss-My-Timer-Is-Going-Off-Today. We can't all be as lucky as you. You can't even commiserate with me on this."

Emitting a soft giggle, Clare stretched her legs out beneath the table, placing down her sandwich and instead grabbing her water bottle.

"Maybe Drew wasn't the one for you, but I'm sure someone else will be. Someone much better than a knuckle-headed jock."

"The cutest knuckle-headed jock who also happens to be QB1 on the team. If I have even the slightest chance of becoming popular this year, he would be my ticket. But look at him." she groused, stirring Clare from her reverie enough for her to glance up as well.

Drew was the quintessential big man on campus, sought after by just about every girl on the power squad and silently admired by the rest in school.

Clare didn't understand the appeal herself, finding his personality indisputably overrated, but she couldn't change Alli's mind on it. She rarely ever could about anything at all, never mind an instant crush that refused to quit. It had staying power despite all the signs that pointed to no, most importantly their differing timers. The fact that Drew wasn't even in possession of his anymore did nothing to deter her either.

"I really, truly think you can do better, Alli." Clare insisted, her smile fading as she tried to reason with her.

Her comment had obviously gone clean over the girl's head, Alli's sullen expression turning into one of fierce determination within seconds.

"If I don't see him with whoever this supposed soul mate is within the week, I'm going after him."

Clare knew all too well that she'd lost the battle with trying to convince Alli otherwise, giving up the effort for the time being.

"But let's talk about _you_!" Alli cheered, earning a few looks from the other students around them.

Clare shrank slightly into her seat, offering a meek smile to onlookers. It was just like her friend to not only neglect to mention a huge occurrence about to happen in her life, but also make a scene when the epiphany that she was being self-absorbed hit her.

Lifting her arm, she could feel her heart lurching pleasantly in her chest, the numbers displayed before her feeling more surreal than ever. "Forty minutes." she breathed, shaking her head subtly in disbelief.

"Do you want to trade timers? I'd really like to meet my soul mate, like, now."

"No thank you. I feel like I've already been waiting an eternity."

She knew it would happen during English, about ten minutes into it. It made her equal parts excited and nervous, knowing it would undoubtedly take place around a bunch of her peers, and in the middle of a lesson, no less. Being disruptive wasn't something that Clare prided herself on, more often than not maintaining an inconspicuous identity but this was something that couldn't be helped.

Once her timer went off, there wouldn't be a force in the world that could halt the event, putting her face to face with her other half.

The thought was enough to nearly put her in cardiac arrest, now that it was so close.

"_Breathe_, Clare. We don't need you dying right before you meet him."Alli urged, noticing how her friend had stopped breathing in the mess of her thoughts. "Listen, I know I've been totally bogging down your big day with my stuff, but I'm really happy for you. This guy is going to be everything you've dreamed he would be."

Clare's heart harbored a palpable ache at the thought, one that felt just as welcome as it did terrifying. Her life up until this point had been predictable, each year following a formula that she could mostly anticipate. Even with certain events like her sister moving and her parents' recent disagreements, they were things she found herself able to adapt to.

But this would forever change the foundation of her life, rattling her existence as she knew it. Whatever path she'd been traveling on would suddenly be merged with a total stranger's, entangling the two irreversibly.

"I hope so, Alli. I really hope so."

* * *

After eyeing the gathering of people settled outside for lunch, Eli pushed aside the guilt he'd felt after ignoring Adam's pleas to eat there. He didn't do well with crowds, far preferring to staying indoors where, if nothing else, he felt it was somewhat private.

"It's seriously way too nice to be eating inside." the boy persisted even as they seated themselves at their usual table, still keeping up the debate.

"Too sunny." Eli grumbled in reply, purposefully turning his chair so his back was facing the window.

"You're only proving my theory that you're some sort of vampire. This girl in my English class who writes about them all the time would be _all over_ you."

He didn't offer up a retort, taking Adam's accusation in stride. Eli was well aware that he differed from most people, raising countless questions and earning multiple looks a day. It was yet another reason why having a soul mate would never work, since he knew better than to believe anyone could ever look at him as if he was normal.

He hadn't felt even relatively close to normal in years, but at times it did bother him that everyone else could tell something was amiss with him. Being obscure was fine, hardly noticed by his fellow peers, but no one truly enjoyed being made to feel like a social leper. It wasn't something he'd ever admit, least of all to those who were doing the judging.

Similar to most of the other things in Eli's life, it was best left to collect dust with the other skeletons decorating his proverbial closet. At least in there, they couldn't cause more trouble, ostracizing him further from everyone around him.

"So what are you going to do when you meet her? Give her a panicked look and run away? Cause that's seeming pretty likely, knowing you." Adam teased, flashing him a smile to let him know it was all in good fun.

"Probably."

"I wish you were joking."

"I'm definitely not." Eli deadpanned, admitting (in implication, if nothing else) that the prospect of what could possibly be on its way terrified him.

If timers and soul mates were actual things, he wasn't sure how he'd find it within himself to cope with it. He had become bitter and jaded to the ideas, harboring the mindset for so long that he didn't think there was a way to reverse it.

But if there really was a girl waiting at the end of his timer, he knew there wouldn't be a way to explain to her why he was so adamantly opposed to the entire thing. Why he couldn't find it in himself to even attempt giving it real chance. The aversion was rooted into him just as deeply as the device itself, and he could help neither from doing whatever they pleased. The lack of control in both situations frustrated him to no end.

Changing from joking to sincerity, Adam wiped his mouth with the back of his hand, turning his head to face Eli.

"If I were in your shoes and about to meet her, I'd probably be scared too. It's huge, you know? This is the rest of your life in one person, right in front of you. She'll probably influence every decision you make from then on. It's not just you anymore. It's you and this other person who you're going to share your life with."

"You're not helping."

"Sorry, sorry." the boy amended, shrugging his shoulders. "I'm just sayin', everyone has either experienced exactly what you're feeling or will eventually. You're not alone with it. I'm betting once the waiting is over, it's not going to be nearly as bad as you're imagining. Hey hell, you might even end up happy."

Shooting Adam a skeptical glare, Eli pushed his tray of food away, suddenly bereft of an appetite. "That outcome right there; that's fiction. But I appreciate your attempt at reassuring me."

The remainder of lunch passed by as previously scheduled, unencumbered by the rising dread Eli was experiencing. As the bell to head for his next class rang, he knew roughly twenty minutes were left without having to look.

The pair exited the cafeteria, stopping at their separate routes to class.

"Well, let me know how it goes, yeah? Whether something happens or not, text me later."

Eli could only offer a meager nod in response, feeling too overwhelmed to do much else. He couldn't tell if the sensation coming over him was one of excitement or trepidation, but felt reluctant to see it as the former.

He entered his English class and wordlessly took his seat, keeping his gaze fixed on the desk before him until he heard his name being called. Lifting his head, he realized it was his teacher addressing him.

"Your guidance counselor just emailed me this morning about a scheduling error. She'd originally planned for you to be placed in the Honors class."

As if the entire situation of his timer soon going off wasn't jarring enough as it was, the terror of it all only tripled in intensity with this change of plans, Eli's mouth going dry as he nodded. After being given the room number, he mechanically moved to retrieve his backpack, exiting the room.

Never before had a weight felt so crippling to him, anchoring down his every step as he traveled to the new classroom. Something had told him that his soul mate couldn't have possibly been in his English class, seeing as though he'd made eye contact with all of them at one point or another. The change of scenery made sense, but did nothing to quell the building suspense. Plot twists were more than welcome in literature and movies, but within his own life, nothing petrified Eli more.

Against his better judgment, his gaze fell to his timer just as he reached the door, twenty two seconds remaining on it.

He made his way into the room, the sound of the door opening cutting off the teacher at the front of the room.

"Ah, Mr. Goldsworthy. I was told you'd be joining us. I'm Ms. Dawes." she said, her tone welcoming, even though Eli could hardly process anything happening.

He wanted nothing more than to close his eyes and refuse to face whatever reality was about to unfold before him, to blanket himself in his denial for a while longer. He didn't feel even remotely prepared for this moment, but he'd run out of time to avoid it.

"We were just assigning writing partners for the semester. Let's see..." she murmured, her eyes scanning the room as Eli's remained on the floor. "You and Miss Edwards would be a good fit. Clare, you'll be working with Eli."

His head lifted just as Miss Dawes said the girl's name. Eli was paralyzed like a deer caught in headlights as the sound of loud beeping filled the room, the noise sounding far louder than it probably was in the otherwise silent space.

She wasn't even two feet away from him, her wrist flashing and beeping just as his was once their eyes met. It was quite possibly the worst outcome of all, he'd realized.

He'd considered what would happen if nothing were to happen at all; if he didn't truly have a soul mate.

He'd considered what would happen if he did in fact have one, but didn't feel an immediate pull to her.

He'd even considered what would happen if somehow, his soul mate was another boy

Just about every unlikely outcome in the universe had been mulled over, except the one he was currently experiencing.

The worst part was that she was _beautiful_.

It was a fresh faced, innocent, undeniable kind of beauty that made Eli ashamed to even breathe the same air as her. She embodied an untainted brand of grace, one he knew he could easily mar if he was given the chance. He'd already ruined one life- he didn't put it past himself to do just the same with another person.

He could feel her eyes boring holes into his own, blue crystalline orbs that only added to her natural appeal. Eli knew he could easily marvel over eyes like hers if he was allowed to, already drawn to them like moths to a flame mere seconds in.

If he was being honest with himself, he'd never felt a pull quite like this one before. Not even with Julia, much to his chagrin. It was exactly as his parents had explained it; a sensation of total belonging created in an instant.

Eli just knew better than to believe it could actually be his.

The room was perfectly silent once the beeping ceased. He could feel the blood leaving his face, the suspense he'd been feeling moments before turning to unadulterated horror.

"We may have a very special partnership on our hands, people." Ms. Dawes' voice rang out, breaking the seemingly perpetual staring contest created between him and the girl.

Already his entire body was telling him to _go go go go_, to leave before he could do something wrong. Before he could take something so obviously good and turn it bad in one fell swoop.

So he ran.


End file.
